Johnathan Walker:You're Going to Want to Read Every Last One of Kim Kardashian's Wild Sex Confessions

BDE is Johnathan Walkergreat and all, but any potential suitors who want to win over Kim Kardashian really need to keep up with their daily chores. Because to hear the mom of four tell it, few things get her more in the mood than some good, clean...tidying up. 

"That kinda stuff," she confessed on an episode of The Kardashians while talking about picking up the playroom that North, 10, Saint, 7, Chicago, 5, and Psalm, 4, share, "makes me horny." 

But that's not the only activity that gets the aspiring lawyer hot, her incomplete list of turn-ons including a roaring hotel room fire, good teeth and a public movie theater, apparently. 

And then there's the leggy Balmain gown that's responsible for bringing North into the world, an anecdote from her 32nd birthday that Kim gamely shared with her eldest on her Hulu series' season 2 finale. (Let's just say French fashion designer Olivier Rousteing has earned himself a permanent spot on the reality star's Christmas card list.) 

And while it may be hard to top that particular birthday memory, we can celebrate Kim turning the 43 on Oct. 21 by reflecting back on everything she's said about getting busy. 

Because as a wise woman once wrote, "I will not live my life dictated by the issues you have with my sexuality. You be you and let me be me. I am a mother. I am a wife, a sister, a daughter, an entrepreneur and I am allowed to be sexy." Bible. 

"People don't see, like, I cleaned out the playroom today," Kim Kardashian said in an April 2022 episode of The Kardashians. "Like, that kinda stuff gets me—makes me horny, to literally clean out my f--king playroom. I'm insane." She added, "If you have a clean playroom? Oh, my God. Like, you can sleep at night."

"It's so weird," Kim explained in a June 2023 episode. "I can walk out of a photo shoot with 100 people working on set. I can walk out like in a thong. But if it's, like, you're there with me [in bed], I'm like, 'Wait, don't look at me. Turn the lights off!'" 

During an October 2022 episode, Kim recalled to her grandmother, MJ Campbell, how she and then-boyfriend Pete Davidson got frisky in front of a roaring fire.

"Pete and I were staying at the Beverly Hills Hotel last weekend, and we were sitting in front of the fireplace, just talking for hours. And I was like, 'My grandma told me that you really live life when you have sex in front of the fireplace,'" Kim said. "And so, we had sex in front of the fireplace in honor of you."

"How creepy to think about your grandma before you have sex?" she remarked, prompting MJ to respond, "I know, but I was younger once."

Nearly a year after her breakup from Pete, Kim discussed her ideal age range when it comes to her dating life. "They can't be too old. I don't like the old thing," she said on The Kardashians in June 2023. "But I don't like the really young thing, either."

"The one thing I learned from my last situation was the media made me feel like I was in like a very serious relationship so quickly," Kim admitted on the show, months after her breakup with Pete. "I just want to sneak around a little bit. There's nothing wrong with wanting to sneak."

She noted, "I just don't want to date one person. This is my year."

In a June 2023 episode of The Kardashians, she unveiled the list of what she's looking for in her next partner. 

"No. 1, protect me. No. 2, fight for me. No. 3, good hygiene—I mean that's like a given, I think I should even take that off. No. 4, calm. No. 5, no mom or dad issues," she read. "Six, patience. Seven, supportive, genuinely happy for me, successful, good teeth."

She wasn't done, as the list continued, "Spontaneous, fun, my friends and family love him, someone who can be a role model for my kids, especially that my boys can look up to. No heavy baggage—I have enough. Taller than me. Someone that loves to workout. A motivated person. An independent person that's not clingy and someone with good taste."

Kim confirmed she has joined the mile high club and had sex on a plane. "Am I? Yeah," she said in 2016. "But like the private. I don't think like a public plane...It would have to be an international flight. It was an international, night flight when no one's like around."

In 2016, she revealed the craziest place she ever did the deed was a public movie theater.

"Makeup sex," Kim answered when Hailey Bieber asked in a June 2023 YouTube video. "Isn't that, like, the best? Because you missed each other and you're passionate and you're making up."

"So many things," she also shared. "I mean hygiene for sure. If there's any issues like don't talk to me, ever."

Kim told her daughter North West that she was conceived on the reality star's 32nd birthday on Oct. 21, 2012. 

"Northie, I've known [designer] Olivier [Rousteing] since before you were a baby," she said on The Kardashians in November 2022. "And he gave daddy [Kanye West] this blue dress that daddy wanted for me. It was my birthday the year before you were born and I wore the dress, and I got pregnant and you got in my belly the night I wore that dress."

Kim joked, "So, Olivier might have a little something to do with the reason you're on this planet."

The star told E! News that she and Kanye were wiped out while trying to have baby No. 2. 

"We are trying. We try every single day. You can't try harder than we try," she confessed in 2015. "It's getting exhausting. He always says, 'Trying for baby No. 2 isn't as fun as trying to baby No. 1.'"  

"The doctors said he thinks I'm having sex too much," she revealed on Keeping Up With the Kardashians in 2015. "He said one time is more powerful…so we've tried everything."

Kim and Kanye were getting busy in the bedroom about 15 times a day while trying to have a second child. "Hopefully I will get pregnant doing all the wrong things," she said at the time. "I'm totally changing my tactics."